Really, I don't.
I don't miss the coughing and the smell and the tip-toeing around other people. I don't miss the lost cash, the exposure to the hot sun, and the looks of disgust on the faces of passerbys. I don't even miss the breaks from reality that I cherished in the past.
It's been two months (give or take a week). I think I offically quit smoking.
I say, "I think," because I can't read the future and I don't know anything (about anything) for sure. But, this looks pretty legit. I've quit before, once, but was smoking the occasional cigarette once or twice a week. This time, I haven't touched one and barely have cravings. I miss it occasionally, the social aspect, the extra something-to-do while walking the dog, the afterhours celebration with some alcohol.
I never considered myself a real "smoker." Sure, I smoked for five years, put packs daily or cartons weekly, but I never fully embraced the smoker-culture. Yes, I smoked indoors, yes, I had ashtrays all over my room, and yes, I loved smoking. I wasn't one of those "uch, i hate this" types, I enjoyed myself with it. A nice, slow, smoke after a good meal. A quiet lonesome smoker listening to a quiet sad song. (I just had a pang of pain and memory, btw.) But, I never liked the smell or the aftereffects. I never smoked near non-smokers. I was very aware of my naccous, abrasive, habit and how disruptive it can be to the enviroment.
Now, as a former smoker, I have been known to occasionally rail against smokers. At a show a couple weeks ago, I was sandwiched between two smokers. I felt ill and annoyed. There was almost some shoving and fighting, but I calmed myself and moved aside. And yet I encourage smokers to "do their thing" near me. It doesn't bother me if it's one person being courteous. This weekend I'll be in a indoor heavy smoke-filled enviroment; I don't know how I'll react.
When people ask me why I quit, I can't really say. My girlfriend had something to do with it. My new job had something to do with it. The damnable heat of a Florida summer definitely had something to do with it. But it was more of a coming-of-age decision. It had been building forawhile. When people would heckle me for smoking, I'd jokingly say, "I'm quitting tomorrow." Joke's on me: It came true.